Different people react differently in different situation. I do believe that the process of creation has never stopped - every second a new life is born. I don't remember seeing so many gay people around, or maybe there were a lot even in our times but most of them we're afraid to reveal their true nature lest they expose themselves to ridicule. Most people don't mind but they deplore seeing the public display especially the older generation. Whereas before the LGBT issue were being discussed in whispers, now the discussions are done in the open paving a clearer understanding on how to handle the situations. In your case, I can't think of a better scenario than waiting for the right moment when nature will take its own course. Your father may not have noticed or just trying to suppress his doubts but surely your mother knows - its a fact you could never hide from someone who reared you.
Filipinos are of a different mold. People who prides themselves of being real men like to ridicule gay people not because they don't like the LGBT crowd but morely because of their own insecurities. Men wouldn't admit it but a great deal of them too had some LGBT moments when they at least fantasized how it is to make out with people of different genders. When the "Phallic Brain" takes over, men think of perverted sex - any kind of hole they could put their thing into. History relates of a lot of perverted sex, even bestiality. Maybe that's one of the reason why Sigmund Freud theorized that men think of sex every seven minutes on average. Why God created the LGBT kind of thing maybe is not for earthlings to comprehend completely, but being there its a must to open our mind on how to handle it with all the knowledge and information we are provided with.
Could you just imagine the kind of dilemma Bruce Jenner had ? Imagine being called the "world's greatest athlete" during his generation, hailed and idolized by sports circle and adored by women. But inside was a "boiling feeling" of wanting to get out of the machismo prison he was in, pretending to everyone his true identity even to his own family. Our very own Rustum Padilla had the same dilemma having to contend with the "macho image" their family spearheaded in the silver screen. I guess they are happier now with their new assumed identities. I couldn't imagine how you're feeling right now and I am not in a position to render a better advice than anyone. I have read and seen movies about the LGBT thing and sometimes it helps a lot when you see that your so-called problem is also other people's problem. I don't want to call it a problem actually but a situation - something you have to learn to live with and be at the best you can be.
The grandeur of history would not have been so had all the artists of the past been all warrior kind of guys. The world of today would have been as colorful and eventful as they are had people were of the same nature - the so-called "freaks", "nerds", "dreamers" and "different people" made those things possible. Unhappiness results from comparing your self to other people, fear results from anticipating the consequences of things, and guilt results from thinking that what you have been doing is hurting other people. There are a lot of ways to handle these things - just keep and open mind, be with people whom you love for chances are they will love you back, and don't be afraid of getting hurt for its the mind and soul conditioning that make us feel we're alive, and most of all open your heart to love extended by people who care and faith to whoever you believe in.
*** ( Hope this is not the last e-mail I would get. Ask any question, even the crazy ones. I don't claim to be an expert but maybe you and I could figure things out. E-mail me at kuyaedperea@gmail.co )
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